What the hell was that? (excerpt of a potential longer story)

[It’s been a while since I’ve written anything that wasn’t a rant, but the other night an partial idea came to me so I’ve written an excerpt from the idea that I may or may not explore further but its a promising start, and i may still have the abilty to write, maybe. I’d like…

Two years? Where have they gone?

At 5:57 am on the 17th of December 2016 my life changed forever. That was the moment that my daughter Jessica was born and since then nothing has ever been the same. These pictures were taken when she was two hour old. And I’ll be honest she broke me. I’ve said this before she was…

What changed?

I know I haven’t been around a lot recently, things have been different for a while now. We don’t talk like we used too, I’ve felt you growing more and more distant, you are sad all the time and nothing I do seems to shake it from your depression. I wish you would talk to…

How can I stop the bad dreams?

It’s 2.25am I’m sitting on the couch because I’ve just been woken up by the little one screaming her heart out. She was sleeping peacefully then boom. I don’t know why? She seems to be in pain but nothing is hurting her. This is happening a lot and all I can think is that she…

Resurfacing Memories [poem]

I’ve not thought of you for a long time, I’ve been living my life having moved on, Then the memory hits me of when you were mine, And I’m sent spiralling, remembering you’re gone. It comes out of nowhere, It hits me like a train, Haunting my memory, Bringing back the pain. My love for…

What is Love?

Love is caring, Love is talking, Love is loss, Love is kind, Love is unyielding, Love is constant, Love is a promise, Love never leaves you, Love touches your soul, But most of all, Love makes life worth living, And Love is pain, Love lets you know that you are alive.

The Space Between Us.

The images your memory conjures no longer causes pain, The memory of you lingers in my heart, I will always hold you close, I will never truly let you go, But you no longer haunt my soul, You live within me, Giving me strength, Giving me power, Together in memory, There is nothing we can’t…

Today’s Milestones

Today has been an unexpected day for milestones. First off, my post that I posted was my 400th post! WOO HOO Two years ago when I started this blog I had no idea I would still be here 400 posts later. Looking back at my first post to now I have changed a lot in…

How did it end up like this?

  ‘How did it end up like this? It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss?’ I’ve been thinking about these words for a while now, the resonate deep within my soul. When I got home last night, I climbed into bed thinking about these words. It was a fantastic night. I met…

One small step….

So last night I said that I was going to try and post more on here than I have been. Now while as per usual I haven’t had time to write anything I do have something to report. Tragically the little one is still sick with an ear infection and is fighting us every time…

One Year On

Its been a long time coming, but today it finally arrived. Today is the first birthday of the most important person in my life. I’m not going to say too much, I’m a bit emotional today. So here are some pictures.

Thinking By The Fire.

Its that time of the year, The time for remembering, The time for celebrating, The time to remember the love we once had, The time to remember the love that is still there, We were meant to be together, It’s truly what I believe, I knew this the day that we met, I should have…

Where do we go from here?

I thought things were going well, We were getting along, I told you things not many know, I trusted you, giving you a peak behind the mask, A glimpse into the depths of my madness, You touched my soul. Then something happened, We stopped talking as much, You started to pull away, We drifted, Lost…

Fifteen years, has it really been that long?

Today is the 6th of October, today is a day to remember for me. Today is my Grandad’s birthday.     He was a great man who had a considerable influence on my life he died fifteen years ago on the 31st of July 2002 if he were still alive he would have been 98…

Dead End

It was a dark time, Life was overwhelming, There was nothing to keep going for, There was nothing but darkness, The light had faded from life, There was a void in my soul filled with nothing but strife, The job was sucking the life out of me, I couldn’t take much more, Everything was at…

This is a personal post

Before you read this post, I want to say that this isn’t my usual fun post, it’s not a story, poem or anything irreverent. It is an intensely personal post about something that I have to get off my chest, its something that has been bothering me for a while and today it has come…

I will try to fix you

I have a feeling things will be coming to an end soon, I know things will be hard for a while, Don’t worry you know I’m here staring up at the same moon, It doesn’t matter how long it’s been, I’m always ready to go the extra mile, You know some of the things that…

She speak…. Again

Well today it happened, as many of many of you know I am currently not working and I am full-time. Stay at home dad. The little one has been good today but it’s a real struggle to keep her still when trying to dress her or change her nappy. She almost flipped off the side…

She Speaks

After weeks of trying, weeks of training, weeks of manipulation today my little girl said her first word I have been talking to her for weeks trying to get her to say “Dad” or “Da Da” and today she finally did it she said her first word. And it was… Mum. I mean come on…

Goodbye my friend

Today I lost a friend. One of the few people who I could tell anything to, one of my best friends. And I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye properly. She has gone off to work on a scientific expedition to Antarctica and won’t be back for about a year. I don’t know…

First Love

When you look back on your first love, what do you think? Sometimes the memories hurt, sometimes they are good, it all depends on how it ended. Sometimes you misremember things making them seem worse or better which ever it is the other half may end up being foggy in your memory. This is something…

I see you

I know you are there, I know you are watching what I do, Talking to you was never forbidden, I want you to know that I know you are here, You think you are hidden, But I know you are here, I just want you to know, That I’ve been fighting to let you go,…

After two am moments 

Ok so I am blatantly ripping off Cyrannys after eight moments for this post. Hope you don’t mind my friend.   My first night on call for feedings with the little one.  Wife goes back to work in the morning 

The Rain Comes Down

The rain comes down, Soaking the ground, We sit there watching it fall, Wondering what to do next, Looking over at you I see the sadness in your soul, I feel the depths of what’s been tormenting you, I’d give everything I have to take the pain away, You look up at me, blinking the…

I’m Not Running Anymore

The wind howled through the trees, making the branches creak and groan, the moon is fighting to shine through the clouds, but it’s a losing battle, There is no light to shine my path, Running from the past, Moving towards the future, But I can’t outrun my past, It follows no matter where the path…

Life never works how you think

Life never works out the way you planned it. When I was younger, I was completely useless with most things I never really figured out where I fit in in life. I was always the outsider, I never belonged to any particular group I floated around, I would talk to everyone, but for the most…

First Father’s Day 

Happy Fathers day to all the dads out there.  This is my first one as a dad and I got this from my beautiful baby girl  I love the wee bear and I know that she will end up adopting him but right now it’s made me so happy.  Much better than a bottle of aftershave  I…

Six months have gone by so fast

Today has been a big day, I know I’ve said that a lot recently but it doesn’t make it any less right. As of today 17-06-2017, my little baby girl Jessica is now a full Six Months old. Where has the time gone? It feels like only yesterday that the wife shouted me through to…

Magic Baby

 I know that I keep harping on about my sore back but it’s been playing on my mind a lot as you can imagine so it’s what I’m writing about. The other thing happened this week was that I got a nice wee tax rebate (woo hoo free money) so today since my back has…

I survived

Today was a challenging day. As I have said for the last week I have been suffering from severe back pain. To the point that I have barely been able to move more than five feet or stand up without excruciating pain. The pain killers that the doctor has had me on have been knocking…

This speaks Volumes

I’ve been wondering a lot recently about what I am doing to with my life.  I don’t know my place in the world anymore and I’m not that same person I was.  Watching an old episode of The Simpsons earlier this spoke volumes to me   I may not know what I’m doing but I know why…

Overwhelming guilt 

I made a huge mistake today and the guilt is eating me up.  I was trying to cut the little ones nails and she moved and I took a huge chunk out of her thumb. The blood went everywhere and she was screaming. I have never panicked as much in my life. I feel so…

Catch up already. 

I came across this picture tonight.  And I thought that nothing could be closer to the truth of life.  If you have loved and lost someone, lost them for any reason, the rational side of you, your Brain, knows the reason why and accepts this and tries to move on its all very clean cut…

Why we Fight 

When I sleep there is no peace in the middle of the night, The world keeps running around in my mind, There are so many thing that want to come out, There is no respite, No chance of leaving it all behind, When the wind howls and the night closes in, The darkness follows leaving…

Watching over each other

I know that you are here, watching what I do, It’s always hard missing someone you care for, We go through life looking for connections When we find the connection that’s right for us, We hold on for dear life until it radiates for all to see, I never thought that this could ever happen…

We Saved Each Other

When I met you I was adrift, I was lost in a sea of despair, Floating around with no direction or place to go, You came along and pulled me to shore, Your love made me feel like I never have before, I drifted for years not knowing where to go. I loved you from…

We both knew it wouldn’t last (A One Hundred Word Story)

We both knew it was temporary, the relationship couldn’t last. Those nights you would come to my door begging to come in, I let you, of course, how could I not? I gave you a place to stay, and we would curl up on the couch together feeling each other’s warmth. You kept me company,…

Fighting For The Light (Poem)

We fight all our lives to keep on going, Trying to rise up against the emptiness inside, There are times we don’t know if it is worth doing, But the demons are rising battling against the tide, Sometimes it feels we are fighting the tide. They are sneaky little ratbags, Hitting us when we are…

I let you in (poem)

I let you in when I couldn’t let myself in, You saw something in me that wanted to get out, My life was trash and headed for the bin, You did something that I wasn’t expecting, You grabbed the wound covering my heart Ripped it open and exposed my soul. You exposed my heart. Looking…

All Good Things….. (The Nurse Part Two)

[This is a follow-up to one of my first stories, The Nurse, it picks up about six months after the events of that story. I wanted to return to these characters to see what happened to them since that meeting which was hot and intense. This is what happened next. On a side note, this…

Moving on is hard this may help

For anyone who has loved and lost just remember this. I am working on a story just now that fits with this rather well watch this space

Blankets,

My daughter is now four months old and it has been a long four months, honestly, it feels like it has been so much longer than that. Her favourite thing that she has, apart from me that is, is her blanket, it is just a normal blanket except it has a bears head on the…

Grey (Poem)

Life is easier when you are young, You never know what way you are going to go, it is so simple that you think you know what is to come, If only we could keep the innocence of youth, But Oh No, We learn that the world is more than Black and White. It is…

Life has changed. 

I’ve been doing a fair bit of thinking recently, my daughter is 12 weeks old today and it’s unreal how much my life has changed.  On a Saturday night (20:40) before she was born I would at this time probably just be finished dinner and thinking about, either, having a drink, putting a film on…

Love and Darkness – Poem (Daily Prompt: Swarm)

You can feel it coming, The need to feel the connection, The feeling swarms your heart, It warms you from head to toes, Everyone who has experienced it knows, The feeling will never go, Even after its lost, It still swarms around you like a ghost. When you try to move on you are haunted…

Love & Loss (A story in Ten-words)

Their time was short, However, they loved a lifetimes worth. [This Ten-word story was inspired by a friend of mine who got some bad new today. This sprang to mind]

Daily Prompt: Baby

Anyone who has been following my blog for a while will know that I have a baby girl. She is ten weeks old tomorrow and the absolute centre of my world. Before she came along I had no intention of ever having kids, I hate kids in general, but this little baby has completely changed…

The Cabin in the Woods.

Originally posted on Welcome to my world.:
Going away for the weekend was your idea and turns out it was a great one. We arrived out at the cabin that I had rented for us and started unpacking. I’ve never been much of a fan of nature being a city boy, but I can appreciate…

Geekifacation Part Three – So it begins…

It’s been three weeks since my daughter was born and my life has completely changed.  I knew I would love this little person beyond anything I have before but I was not prepared for how I actually feel about her.  As I said she is three weeks old already and it has flown by. Tomorrow…

Daily Prompt: Gone – Poem

You left me for your own good, It wasn’t easy, loosing you, but I knew I had to let you go, Now I’m here with out your love it feels like my world is under a hood, You’re gone from my life, I made the decision, It hasn’t been easy, it’s been full of strife,…

Well that was fast….

My wife was admitted to hospital last night after her water broke at 01.53am. We got to the hospital and were told that she was good to go. We were rolled through to the maternity ward. Things were progressing my faster that anticipated she was here. Word in four hours of the water breaking my…

You own my heart (poem) 

​I suffer through the cold, I’m changing my ways, all for you,  I love you more than you could know, I’ll think about you for the rest of my days, You make me want to be at my best, I’ll be there for you everyday of my life, My future is you, you are my…

Love and Loss (Poem) 

​You came into my life at a turbulent time, It was difficult for me to love , but you made me smile,  I fixed you and you fixed me, we saved each other from a world of strife, You made my life better, the first woman I’ve loved,  But It got too hard, I had…

Ten Weeks to go

I am currently sitting here at work, but I can’t concentrate on anything I’m supposed to be doing. Today is a big milestone for me in life, it’s only ten weeks until my daughter will be born (that’s if she doesn’t decide to make an early appearance.) From the day we found out my wife…

Geekifacation

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a world-class geek. I love all kinds of Sci-Fi.  Star Wars, Star Trek, Battlestar, Supernatural, Doctor Who, The Marvel Films, Buffy, Angel, Firefly (basically anything by Joss Whedon) the list goes on and on. So with this in mind, I have already started the process of Geekifacation of…

The Tease

It’s been a long day at work sitting in an office staring at a computer screen or running back and forth to the printer. It was around one pm when Olivia started to torment me. Olivia is my girlfriend we have been together for three years, but she has been working away for the last…

Three Day Quote Challenge – The Grand Finale

I have been asked to partake in a 3 Day quote challenge by rhapsodyboho.wordpress.com and I wanted to thank her for thinking of me in this challenge. Thank you very much, and please be sure to circle back to my nominator’s blog to find more quotes. The rules are simple and short: Thank your nominator…

Three Day quote challenge – Day One

I have been asked to partake in a 3 Day quote challenge by rhapsodyboho.wordpress.com and I wanted to thank her for thinking of me in this challenge. Thank you very much, and please be sure to circle back to my nominator’s blog to find more quotes. The rules are simple and short: Thank your nominator…

Reunited: The Hotel

[Authors note: I have been working on this story for a long time and is a follow-up to “The Hotel.” Of all the stories I have written, this is the one that I have been asked: “what happened next?” It has been taken me some time to write this and get it just right so…

Pending Fatherhood & Fears

This week is a big week for me in my life. As I’ve said before in my posts, my wife is pregnant with our first child and to say that I’m a little nervous would be the understatement of the century. We had a scan this week, and I got to see the wee one…

Friday Night Storm

It was a long day, having been at work for ten hours working my ass off I was so glad that it was Friday and that I could just go home and chill out for the night. My plans for the evening were simple: Home, Shower, take out and Ps4 then sleep. I have been…

Preview of “Reunited” a follow up to “The Hotel”

[This is a preview is a follow up to one of my older stories “The Hotel” I’ve been working away at it for a while but havent gotten it quite right. I’m looking for feedback on what I’ve written here as follow up to know if its worth continuing it or not. Thanks C]  …

What a wake up call

I’ve been up all night studying for an exam I have coming up in psychology, and I’ve fallen asleep at the desk it’s been a long evening, and I’m so tired I can resist anymore so I just lay back and fell asleep in the chair. I have a fantastic dream you have come back…

The Cabin in the Woods

Going away for the weekend was your idea and turns out it was a great one. We arrived out at the cabin that I had rented for us and started unpacking. I’ve never been much of a fan of nature being a city boy, but I can appreciate the quiet, you, on the other hand,…